Tomorrow will be the day, but I’m not feeling the excitement as I should be. I mean … going out with someone you like; shouldn’t that be the happiest moment a person should have? I don’t know. I think there’s something within that is preventing me from being thrill but I don’t know what this “thing” is. Could it be the unsuccessfulness of the last relationship? Or could it be that I don’t really like her as much to feel thrill. For whatever reason, it’s tomorrow. I guess tomorrow it would be the so call climax of my future relationship. I consider it as a test, could I really put away my past and accept the changes. At times I would be excited and thrilled, like around my friends but at times when I’m alone I couldn’t find myself being happy. At times I feel so guilty, it’s like I’m just showing off in front of my friends. I hope that’s no true. I wish Annie could understand if I couldn’t pass my own test that I set for myself. I know it’s going to be unfair and all those crap, all I could say is sorry. Well, maybe it’s not that I don’t like her. Maybe it’s the fact that I put too much hope on her, I’m going to end up in the same spot, lonely and have to end up forgiving and forgetting her. If things don’t work out, we could always be friends. Sometimes I feel have a friend is way better than having a girlfriend. Someone you could talk to and share your feelings too, but it’s hard to find such a person that loves to listen to me talk without liking me.

     There’s just so much question being asked but there’s no one to answer them. Some are complex, some are simple. The night has fallen and it’s almost tomorrow. Will I back out? I don’t know… I wish I had never exposed her feeling of liking me. I would feel better and not have to worry. Worry about what? I don’t even know. Why am I asking? I don’t know? What my point? I don’t know. Why I write this entry? I don’t know.